tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35939670155150687302024-03-04T21:16:40.231-08:00LettersNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.comBlogger48125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-451936064343788822011-10-22T15:14:00.000-07:002011-10-22T15:15:43.265-07:00To LifeDear Life,<div><br /></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >STOP IT!!!!</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Love,</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Nomes</span></div>Naomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-78291416019697921652011-08-16T11:36:00.000-07:002011-08-16T11:44:33.693-07:00To Laundry<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">To My Worthy Opponent: Laundry,</div><div>
<br /></div><div>So, we meet again. It has been one week since our last encounter, but I want you to remember who it was who defeated you. It was a tough battle with many casualties, but I came off victorious! Now, with you piling up once more, it is time again to go to battle. It may take a few days, what with your accomplices (my traitorous children and husband), but I will win! I will prevail!! I will conquer!!!</div><div>
<br /></div><div>Sincerely,</div><div>General Nomes</div><div>
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<br /></div>Naomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-30024222754468690482011-07-08T16:04:00.000-07:002011-07-08T16:10:12.969-07:00To StressDear Stress,<br /><br />It has come to my attention that you are living in my body as a most unwelcome guest.<br /><br /><span class="Apple-style-span" >GET OUT!!!</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Sincerely,</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" >Nomes</span></div>Naomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-45116017160948784862011-06-28T15:53:00.000-07:002011-06-28T15:55:07.518-07:00To My ChildrenDear Children,<br /><br />The screaming at each other is getting REALLY old. However, since you like to do it so much, I WILL NOW BE SCREAMING RIGHT BACK! LET'S SEE HOW YOUR EARS CAN TAKE IT! AND REMEMBER, MOMMY USED TO BE A DRUM MAJOR IN HIGH SCHOOL, SO SHE HAS GREAT DIAPHRAGM CONTROL!<br /><br />LOVE, MOM!Naomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-53861513452663634632008-12-31T07:56:00.000-08:002008-12-31T08:04:14.922-08:00To 2008Dearest 2008,<br /><br />I have to say that all in all you have been pretty good to me. The first half was a tad difficult, what with my husband being in Iraq, but even that was all right thanks to my wonderful parents. You also gave us a great Winter full of snow, and then a beautiful Spring, so no complaints there!<br /><br />The Summer saw the return of my husband and the reuniting of our family. We also drove across the country, bought a new house, and started a new school year! The kids celebrated birthdays. I turned 30. The only thing I would change was the humidity. I'm going to have to ask 2009 if they could dial it down a notch.<br /><br />You also allowed me to experience my first Autumn in about five years. THANK YOU! It has been so long since I have seen Autumn colors! I would love to have Autumn all year round, but I know that you years just aren't all about that.<br /><br />The Winter was delightful, although I probably wouldn't have been sad to see more snow. I know you have been giving it to the rest of the country, why not us? That's another thing I'll have to mention to 2009.<br /><br />I know that times have been tough for a lot of people lately, especially in your back half, but I just wanted to let you know that even with the ups and downs, I'm grateful to have known you. Good bye, sweet 2008. Here's hoping that 2009 will be just as good, if not better!<br /><br />Love,<br />NomesNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-80923491177107471992008-11-23T15:05:00.001-08:002008-11-23T15:08:16.726-08:00To My Darling Three Year OldMy Darling Three Year Old,<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;font-size:180%;" >GAH!!!!!!!!</span><br /><br /><br />Love,<br />MomNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-21744802839171433222008-08-19T12:15:00.000-07:002008-08-19T12:21:05.563-07:00To My ISP - Part IIDear ISP,<br /><br />Um, so, I just want to say how appreciative I am to you for sending out a technician to my house so that we could see why my DSL was still not working. Turns out, um, that it was my phone cord not being plugged in all of the way.<br /><br /><br />......................<br /><br /><br /><br />I'm so sorry that I have become one of those people.<br /><br /><br />Trying to not be mortified beyond belief and failing miserably,<br />NomesNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-6474485113667150842008-08-18T16:12:00.000-07:002008-08-18T16:19:18.805-07:00To My ISPDear ISP,<br /><br />FOR THE FREAKIN' LOVE OF PETE! When I ordered internet on a Monday and you told me it was going to be up and running by Thursday, it should have darn well been up and running on Thursday. Instead I have had to call tech support multiple times and get various work orders accomplished. So after one work order mysteriously closed for no reason, after the order for my internet got routed to a completely different office to where it was not supposed to be routed, and after being told that it would be up by 5:00pm today (Monday), it is <span style="font-style: italic;">still not up!!!</span> Seriously! I have one more work order in process. But I tell you what, if that service guy doesn't show up tomorrow, I might have to become slightly miffed and right a <span style="font-style: italic;">very nasty letter.</span><br /><br />Hoping to be connected to the WWW before the 22nd Century,<br />NomesNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-56049883913091134212008-07-30T06:10:00.000-07:002008-07-30T06:16:33.813-07:00To Self-ControlDear Self-Control,<br /><br />I'm sorry, but you are really getting on my nerves, lately! I've been craving chocolate for the last three weeks, yet every time I go to the store and walk by the candy, I can't bring myself to buy any! I have thoughts like, "Oh, I really don't need this right now," or "Maybe next time." I think the worst was when I went to go pick up a pint of ice cream (with the intention of buying some B&J's Phish Phood) and I found myself looking at the nutritionals of another brand! I ended up getting Breyer's Strawberry! COME ON! All I want is some chocolate yet you won't let me have some! Just leave me alone.<br /><br />Hoping to abandon you,<br />NomesNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-77829906835953198992008-07-24T18:53:00.001-07:002008-07-24T18:59:21.971-07:00To a Sleeping ChildDear Sleeping Child,<br /><br />As I wait for your older brother to finish his bedtime ritual, I notice you asleep in your bed. I decide to watch you for a moment. You look so peaceful. Your breathing is so soft and it is fun to watch you with your slightly open mouth and your kool-aid mustache leftover from dinner. I notice that you don't suck your thumb while you sleep anymore. That's a good thing, sweet boy. Although, maybe not so good, as it means you are growing up. I wonder what you dreaming about, if you are dreaming at all. Is it about your beloved trains or are you dreaming about playing with your brothers and sister in the morning? You don't stir as I lean over and give you kisses on your forehead, on each of your cheeks, on your hand. You are a dear, sweet boy even when you aren't sleeping and I love you. Thanks for being my son.<br /><br />Good night,<br />MomNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-58875688956292438442008-07-24T08:50:00.000-07:002008-07-24T08:52:29.819-07:00To BabyDearest Sweet Baby,<br /><br />Thank you so much for making me slow down from my hectic schedule of unpacking and cleaning to take the time and dance with you to the rhythm of the washing machine. I will always treasure that moment of you snuggling against my shoulder and the two of us twisting and swaying. I love you, baby. Try not to grow up to the point where you don't like washing machine dancing. Because I know I'll always love it.<br /><br />Love,<br />MomNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-60622430991575229962008-03-26T22:29:00.000-07:002008-03-26T22:39:34.746-07:00To the Stargate Television ShowTo the Stargate Television Show (and all other forms of mindless escapism),<br /><br /><span style="font-style:italic;">Hold on while I adjust my geek glasses...</span><br /><br />Thank you so much for giving me something to keep my mind off of my husband's long absence. While I am following your show and your "intricate" story lines I don't think about loneliness or sadness. You are not my only form of distraction (I <span style="font-style:italic;">do</span> have friends, projects, and fun family activities to keep me busy) I do appreciate the ease with which I can access you and watch you in my bed at night when there isn't anything else to do but think about things. Thanks for the laughs, the eye-rolling, and the eye candy. I honestly think that this deployment might have gone much slower had it not been for you. And between ten years worth of episodes of SG-1 and coming up on four years of Atlantis, you have kept my time watching you quite varied.<br /><br />Oh, and Doctor, when you return in April, I'm all yours! *hugs the TV*<br /><br />Yes, well, enough of my silly fangirling, but even adult mothers need to have some guilty pleasures in their lives. Thanks for being that guilty pleasure.<br /><br />Completely ashamed that she knows what DHDs, GDOs, P-90s and all of the rest are,<br />NomesNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-11214711443131686342008-02-07T19:53:00.000-08:002008-02-07T19:57:04.490-08:00To the Pause ButtonDearest Live TV Pause Button,<br /><br />Thank you so much for existing. I can't even begin to express my gratitude to the increase in peace and harmony you have brought to our small family. Now, when it is time for meals, I no longer hear, "but I <span style="font-style: italic;">love</span> this show, Mom! Can't we just finish it?" Also, you are very useful for when I need to take a call. I can talk with my friends and acquaintances and not miss the newscast/movie/sci-fi nerd flick I am watching.<br /><br />In short, thank you for letting us do more things without excluding the all-powerful and wonderful Boob Tube.<br /><br />Sincerely,<br />NomesNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-45584049181615795442008-01-14T20:14:00.000-08:002008-01-14T20:16:27.801-08:00To My ChildrenDearest Children,<br /><br />Thank you so very much for filling the required amount of seats necessary for me to legally drive in the diamond lane. If not for you, we would still be in the city during rush hour.<br /><br />Loving (most of the time) that you children take up space,<br />MomNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-343200025777041152007-11-26T11:26:00.000-08:002007-11-26T11:30:21.270-08:00To 5:00pmDear 5:00 (of the post meridian persuasion),<br /><br />What is it about you that turns perfectly lovely children into crazy, loud, lunatics? It seems, at least in our household anyway, that whenever you come around the kids just go nuts. One minute they're playing happily and quietly, the next they are screaming about something-or-other, or else running around in circles. I'm really having a hard time grasping the meaning of this change in behavior.<br /><br />I know that it is probably unintentional on your part, and I know that it is impossible to keep you from coming around the house every night, but couldn't you do <span style="font-style: italic;">something</span> to keep the children calm? Because when the Crazy Children arrive, Monster Mommy is not far behind and I am not so terribly fond of her, either.<br /><br />Getting the riot gear ready for your arrival,<br />NomesNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-3378015777799301902007-11-15T14:41:00.000-08:002007-11-15T14:59:51.858-08:00To Those of You Wondering If I Have Fallen Off the Face of the EarthDear Those-Who-Have-Been-Wondering-if-I-Have-Fallen-Off-the-Face-of-the-Earth,<br /><br />No, I have not. I am still around. Life has been exceedingly crazy the past two weeks. We spent the week leading up to Halloween discovering that my husband was going to Iraq, deciding that the rest of us should go live at my parents' house for the duration of hubby's tour, packing up/cleaning our rental house, withdrawing children from school, and preparing for a cross-country road trip. All went fairly well, except for the fact that trying to pack an entire house and subsequently cleaning it all by oneself while dealing with four children is <span style="font-style: italic;">not</span> and enjoyable experience. Thank goodness for friends who took pity on me and watched my children for me! And we did not get the house cleaned to the management company's requirements. I know we didn't. So bye-bye, deposit. You will be missed.<br /><br />The drive across the country was actually rather enjoyable. We did the first leg right after we turned in our keys to the management company. It was hard, seeing as we had spent the whole day cleaning. But we made it. I have to say that the South in the Fall is just absolutely breathtaking. And the further north we drove, the more beautiful it became. The kids did well in the car. Not too many meltdowns. Thank goodness we have adaptable children!<br /><br />(three and a half days later...)<br /><br />Nebraska is not very, shall we say, lovely. But Wyoming along I-80 is worse. Much worse.<br /><br />We arrived at my parents' house Sunday evening, just in time for dinner. Dinner is good. Especially after living off of fast food. *shudders* Fast food, while good on occasion, is <span style="font-style: italic;">not at all</span> good more than two times in a row. So not good. So thanks, Mom and Dad, for the delicious meal. It was very much appreciated.<br /><br />We spent the next couple of days getting settled in. It's amazing how moms (and I am speaking of myself at this point) are given the gift/curse of being able to run off of pure adrenaline when the need arises. I had a sinus infection (did I mention that) for the whole packing/moving/traveling ordeal, but was still able to unpack. I knew a crash was inevitable, but things must be done to preserve sanity in an insane situation.<br /><br />Hubby and I were able to get a night all to ourselves at a quaint little hotel two nights before he left. It was wonderful. And that's all that needs to be said.<br /><br />It was difficult saying good-bye to Hubby. And that's all that needs to be said.<br /><br />(The following week...)<br /><br />The kids have started school. It's nice to have a routine, again. It makes things seem more normal. My family has been wonderful. They've been so helpful, and I just can't thank them enough. The kids are calming down, as well. It almost got to the point where we were all ready to sell them on eBay, but they are quickly redeeming themselves. Except can anyone please explain to me why children seem to become hyper after 5pm? Or is it just my children?<br /><br />So there you go. I have not fallen of the face of the Earth. I'm just hanging on the edge for a bit.<br /><br />The End,<br />NomesNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-52586445518949784872007-11-12T13:12:00.000-08:002007-11-12T13:14:04.697-08:00To Baking BreadDear Baking Bread,<br /><br />I just wanted to let you know how much I LOVE your smell. I seriously think someone should figure out how to bottle up your aroma and market it, because I would so buy it. <br /><br />Of course, I could just keep baking more loaves of bread...<br /><br />*deep breath and contented sigh*<br />NomesNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-62902534134278219472007-11-12T13:09:00.000-08:002007-11-12T13:12:24.932-08:00To the Next Six MonthsTo the Next Six Months,<br /><br />I know that at the end you are going to seem to have just flown by, but we are not at the end, we are at the beginning. My dearest husband (out of all of my other husbands) is going to be serving a tour of duty in Iraq during your lifetime. Please, I ask you, to go by quickly. Don't feel as though you have to dawdle. I know that we should enjoy time, but for you I can make an exception. During your passing could could you also just keep an eye on him and make the time go quickly for him, as well? Thanks. I would really appreciate that.<br /><br />Hoping you are very, very swift,<br />NomesNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-71558024485661519952007-11-12T13:07:00.000-08:002007-11-12T13:09:03.403-08:00To the BabyDear Baby,<br /><br />You really must stop doing headers into table legs. I mean, I know that you're brain is still young and growing, but constant bangs into table legs can't be good.<br /><br />Love,<br />MomNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-24769049641827011342007-10-21T10:14:00.000-07:002007-10-21T10:17:11.024-07:00To Kim's ScarDear Kim's Scar,<br /><br />You really need to leave Kim alone. She tells me that you are bothering her with your itchiness. That's really not very kind of you. She has a life she needs to lead and you are very distracting.<br /><br />So stop. Just stop.<br /><br />Sincerely,<br />NomesNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-14524315382724426372007-10-20T17:51:00.001-07:002007-10-20T17:58:45.704-07:00To ExhaustionDear Exhaustion,<br /><br />What is going on? Are you trying to kill me? I have not had a decent night's sleep in, oh, about <span style="font-style: italic;">forever</span>! I have even had to resort to drinking the occasional caffeinated soda to even function. I am most displeased.<br /><br />Yes, I know that I have a bit of stress, but I'm sure no more than the next person. I know there are many people out there with small children, that there are other people up to their eyeballs in debt (ours is of the student loan variety, as you well know). I know there are other women besides me who are wondering if and when their husbands are going to be called up to go over to Iraq. It is not just I who volunteers, and runs a household, and cares for others. I know there are women who are going through much more than I, and for that reason I am going to defeat you.<br /><br />I am going to start exercising. I am going to eat right. I am going to go in for a physical. I am going to take time for myself once a week. I am going to do more service. I am going to reserve time each day for spiritual contemplation and meditation. I am going to look at what I can do and not focus on what I can't. I am going to celebrate each day as a gift. I am going to cultivate my sunny attitude. I am going to compile a list of things I am grateful for. I am going to keep courting my husband. I am going to cherish my children.<br /><br />By doing all of these things and more, I am going to defeat you, Exhaustion. Our time together is limited. You have been warned.<br /><br />About to kick you to the curb,<br />Nomes<br /><br />P.S. You can thank my dear friend Cathy for reminding me how to care for myself. She's got your number!Naomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-74954241144996653772007-10-18T06:19:00.000-07:002007-10-18T06:25:49.531-07:00To My Letter ReadersDear Readers,<br /><br />Thank you for taking time out of your busy day to come and read my letters! I've received tons of positive feedback and I thank you for that, as well.<br /><br />I was just wondering if there were any subjects for which you would like to see a letter? Comment with as many as you like, and I will try to write something witty. If you don't have any, then don't comment. It's okay if you don't. I'll still respect you. :)<br /><br />Sincerely,<br />NomesNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-48678101886515868272007-10-18T06:17:00.001-07:002007-10-18T06:17:57.817-07:00To ClothesDear Clothes,<br /><br />Isn't there any possible way that you could <span style="font-style: italic;">all</span> be wrinkle free?<br /><br />Sulking back to the ironing board,<br />NomesNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-87233243231891791992007-10-18T06:14:00.000-07:002007-10-18T06:16:58.602-07:00To NetflixDear Netflix,<br /><br />Thank you for providing a service that saves me from taking four children into a video store. (I'm sure that all of the patrons and staff of the video store thank you, as well). You also help me save on gas. Oh, and I can also catch up on television shows I've missed. I love you for that!<br /><br />Waiting anxiously for the mail,<br />Nomes<br /><br />P.S. You are beyond better than Blockbuster. Be proud of that.Naomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3593967015515068730.post-29337247709614284322007-10-16T09:30:00.000-07:002007-10-16T09:31:25.096-07:00To FurnitureDear Furniture,<br /><br />I wish that I had some of you. Namely bookcases. And dressers. Dressers would be nice. And perhaps a new bed. Yeah. That sounds good.<br /><br />Hoping to see you soon,<br />NomesNaomihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12341331386509266033noreply@blogger.com0